Saturday 25 January 2014

Address tae a vegan haggis

Oh haggis wi yir sonsie face,
Stuffed wi veg and hint o' mace
Blood an' puddin's, nae a trace
Nae painch, tripe or thairm.
Well are ye worthy o' a Grace
And dae ma hert nae herm.

Rustic Labour makes fine a coo,
Big o' hurdie, slavering moo,
A cross o' Limmy an' Belgian Blue.
Nae slechered in sharn!
The kye are a' vegan but end up as stew
Oh, whit a shan.

But mark the Rustic, haggis fed
Stuffed wi' oats and nuts (well shred)
Neeps and tatties, oaten bread,
Fit fur a king!
Stappit fu' wi' a muckle spread
Nae blud or onyhin'.

Is that a scornful een I see!
Gowkin' sneerily at ma tea?
A widnae poke fun at thee.
Each tae thir ain.
Eat whit ye like, it's nae up tae me,
I'll eat ma grain.

Ye Pow'rs wha make Mankind your care,
Dinnae care whit gings in oor fare,
Loadit wi' sugar, horsemeat and mair,
Gies me the boak.
A weel made haggis whether bloody or bare,
Will dae maist folk.

Slainte!



Saturday 11 January 2014

"Is your wife prettier than mine?"

A belated but Happy New Year to you all.

I'm just about back to good, rude health again and raring to see an incredible year for Scotland, land reform, tenant farming amid others.

Like thousands of others, our family watched David Miller's "The Men Who Own Scotland", topics covered were investment (or apparent lack of), land which has been kept by one family for many years, concentration of land ownership (predominately male thanks to primogeniture or a male heir) plus other issues.
The opening gambit made by one landowner (53,000 acres) was astonishing. In response to the question whether such concentrated land ownership in Scotland was 'fair', the landowner's reply included "It may not be fair but is it fair that your wife may be prettier than mine?"
The arrogance and sheer vapidness of this man's reply is overwhelming yet the same 'brain' lairds it over some 53,000 acres and all within.

Sadly for us, very few lairds were willing to make similar statements yet some who live on these vast estates are all too aware of an uncaring, callous and somewhat sexist view held by the men who make decisions over the lives of those who live on these estates. The ordinary tenant, whether they are farmers or rent a house often find that it is a complete waste of time trying to get anywhere with such narrow minded men - I include factors (or the pseudo factors who never quite made the grade yet who have influence in estate matters. Power rich, I.Q. poor).

In this year, 2014 for those still stuck in medieval times, the ability to manage land is shared by very capable and competent women and men.  The country is run by very capable women and men yet our country is owned by men who appear to gauge whether a wife is pretty or not so pretty as a reply to whether the most concentrated landownership *in the world* was fair or not. Vapid and out of touch does not even begin to describe it.

Well, Sunshine, let me give it to you straight, you may not be aware of real life up there on your ivory tower but whilst you measure a person's ability in Helens without the 1000 ship launch, how do you feel about the fact that people think you are an utter fool? We could use this as a new measurement for being out of touch "Is your husband lairdier than mine?"
To the man on the same programme who wondered if he would have his estate for another 500 years, I would be surprised if you will continue to own it for another 500 days.
To the man who was alledgedly worth 1/4 of a billion sitting on a run down estate yet blathering on about how much he had 'invested', we can see through the bluster. You just want a windfarm for the subsidies, dude. If the estate is costing so much, sell it to the community for the price you paid for it. I bet those derelict houses soon become home to families, the schools repopulated, communities thrive.

Whilst these men disassociated themselves from reality and used our land as personal playgrounds  or tax avoidances to the exclusion of others, women stopped giving a toss what men thought about their looks and got on with things using their intelligence, capability and the belief in equality. We women live in the now, realistic and comfortable about ourselves and our abilities.
Those of us who have less (in this instance, do not own vast estates) have less to lose and more to gain, the difference being that your ordinary Scot recognises equality and recognises the land itself needs urgent care.
Farming needs a good kick in the 20's but landownership needs a revolution. A feudal castration.

Why are we sitting back permitting these medieval, feudal fools to own, hog and decimate the views you see as you pass on a journey? They are using good Scottish land for their own financial gain and we, the Scottish people are paying them to do it.

Regardless of looks, sex, money and status, the common person is more than capable of better managing and maintaining the vast and sterile looking land than the vapid and sterile looking men who currently own it.

My favourite response to the issue of the division of land in Scotland not being fair and the thoughts of the landowners being "Tough, deal with it" was the excellent reply from Andy Wightman who simply stated...

"Don't worry, we will".